I knew that whatever I was belting out was wrong, but without knowing the singer or song, what was I to do?

I was singing:
“He hops in his coat
He’s yessin his note
Into his mouth
And down to his toes.
You spike your makeup,
Get into your truck…”

(Something along those lines.)

The song is catchy. I started asking around. Someone suggested Eminem. Nope, it’s a female. And it’s really, really popular, and I cannot keep up with all of the new hits. No one knew what I was talking about.

Except one friend – one that is a musician – and she sent me the real lyrics.

The song is actually Katy Perry’s “Hot and Cold”. I got a pretty good laugh out of myself.

The next song is one that everyone is guilty of butchering. I think I am probably the exception when it comes to cutting this one to pieces…


I was singing:
I been lured into your
Mangled carpet Trap…
Hey, Wayne!
I gotta nuke airplane
Forever a dad to
The Price is Right…
Me eating your kids
Forget no one just yet
Cook myself some angel hair
And navy bread
Broken hammer of your handness
I’m left black

You probably guessed it – Nirvana’s “Heart Shaped Box”.

I’m sorry to those whose songs I’ve ruined, and I know that “Hot and Cold” will never be the same to its fans after reading this.