Mental Health Self-Therapy Journal
My reality today differs from a year ago. I’m not the same person, because both my truth and beliefs have drastically changed. Unfortunately, I can’t fight reality. With so many things out of my control, I try to control who I’m around. I’ve become so accustomed to being alone that most people’s energy disrupts my... Continue Reading →
Now that I’m sober, I didn’t think I would gaslight my creep detector until I recently found myself in an uncomfortable and vulnerable situation in the privacy of my own backyard. This is something I needed to discuss in counseling, because it was a traumatizing experience. No matter how much I think I set boundaries,... Continue Reading →
Little has changed. Sitting here, minding my own business, trying to survive… Yet, I STILL get bothered by creepy people crawling out of the woodwork, like cockroaches during a heavy rain. A few weeks ago, on a Sunday morning, I received a text from a number I didn’t recognize, asking how I was. The area... Continue Reading →
Isn’t it strange how and why we remember certain incidences? One in particular I’ve recalled over the years happened during a college class in the 1990s. On a nice day, our instructor taught in the outside atrium, which doubled as a hallway for students. That day, the class consisted of all women, most of which... Continue Reading →
Last year, a woman new to the area reached out to me on a job app. Naturally, I was extremely skeptical of anyone contacting me online, because of scams and other agendas. Once I established more information about her, our conversations came easy; she’s looking to make new friends, because she’s been stuck inside for... Continue Reading →
(Note: It’s taken me a week to write this, so it doesn’t reflect today’s much lighter mood. Today was the first time since last summer I was able to run errands in multiple places without feeling sick or like I was going to pass out. Yesterday, I did a bunch of work around the house... Continue Reading →
The post title goes with the season, but it also fits what’s been on my mind. At the end of my post Sobriety & Isolation, I mentioned being haunted by mistakes. Imagine objects halfway buried in beach sand. The tide comes and goes, pushing the sand, eventually burying the objects completely so they’re unseen. Over... Continue Reading →
Considering I’ve isolated for the past year (and most of 2020) with minimal human interaction, I didn’t expect that I would talk so much at my first counseling appointment. The session was the initial intake via video with the VA psychologist. My morning wasn’t going so well, as I wasn’t feeling great physically or emotionally.... Continue Reading →
I began this writing a few weeks ago and have filled it in to update. Finally, I was able to speak to a VA counselor this week, and one of the first things I told her was a brief summary of Worst VA Doctor Experience. (The following day, I received a phone call informing me... Continue Reading →
Sobriety hasn’t been all it’s cracked up to be. I’m miserable and more depressed than ever, but it’s not because I miss alcohol. It’s because reality sucks, and I’m still sick. Alcohol and positive thoughts kept my mental health afloat for years. I have ditched them both in order to be the real me, which... Continue Reading →
Free The Burden 