My reality today differs from a year ago. I’m not the same person, because both my truth and beliefs have drastically changed. Unfortunately, I can’t fight reality. With so many things out of my control, I try to control who I’m around. I’ve become so accustomed to being alone that most people’s energy disrupts my... Continue Reading →
Ignorant People Add to My Solitude
When someone is sick or injured, they typically have a support system to help them through it. The lack of empathy I’ve experienced from a few family and friends during this time is appalling. People who lack empathy cannot relate to others, and have no business giving advice. I cannot handle the stress they bring... Continue Reading →
Men Never Cease to Amaze Me, Either
Isn’t it strange how and why we remember certain incidences? One in particular I’ve recalled over the years happened during a college class in the 1990s. On a nice day, our instructor taught in the outside atrium, which doubled as a hallway for students. That day, the class consisted of all women, most of which... Continue Reading →
Health Food Store Employees Are Not Doctors
Since I have little energy to spare, I choose to interact with very few people. Simple interaction with people that I do enjoy being around is tiring, but not draining. Still, I can only take a few hours of that, and not for days in a row. Something like a (positive) visit from a friend... Continue Reading →
Insomnia & a Lit Up Brain
Imagine a dim room that’s been lowly lit for several months and suddenly lights up very brightly. Everything is so clear and bright, like a day without a cloud in the sky. Those lights stay on for several hours or days or weeks, maybe even months. Sometimes they dim for a few hours, but they... Continue Reading →
Life is Full of Disappointments, and Who Do I Trust?
(**Note: Parts of this were written on different days, and I pasted it as one.) Everything is weird to me, like this big invisible thing I can’t explain opened up and allowed me to see that life isn’t at all what I ever thought it to be. Being sick the past year has changed my... Continue Reading →
Two Good Days
I had two good days last week. Two days a week is the most I’ve been able to get for the past few years. First, I blamed it on having heavy periods and other menstrual problems. I figured after a hysterectomy, my pain would leave. It hasn’t completely. Sometimes I feel as if I have... Continue Reading →
Still Undiagnosed
I started writing this last week: Most physical activity is a catalyst, which sucks, because I cannot get the exercise I need. Doing simple yoga stretches triggers painful spasms, so I sit and cry, because I don’t know if I will ever be able to do normal things again. I feel like my quality of... Continue Reading →
I Think I Have MS
I have attempted to write this for a few weeks, but my concentration is limited and patience short. Since reporting all of these issues to my PCP last summer, I figured I’d be doing great by now, living a normal life. Boy, was I wrong! At this point, I am in fear that I may... Continue Reading →
Another Trip to the ER
At the moment of this writing, I am not feeling well at all. After having a few good days last week, that’s all I’ve been granted. Since keeping a food diary, I’ve noticeably grown super sensitive to foods that never particularly bothered me before or that now affect me on a whole new level. Some... Continue Reading →